How can I get my toddler to stay in their bed at night?

Deciding when to move your toddler out of the crib can be a difficult decision. While we find that children are generally more equipped to stay in their bed at night if you wait until they’re 3 years old to , there are many reasons you may make the change sooner. (If they’re climbing out of their crib, for example.) Either way it’s common for little ones to have trouble staying in bed at bedtime and overnight. 

In this article, we’ll help you understand why toddlers sometimes have trouble staying in bed, provide tips for getting kids to sleep in their own bed, and troubleshoot ways to handle night wakings and setbacks. 

IN THIS ARTICLE: 

Understanding why toddlers don’t want to stay in bed

The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) recommends that parents and caregivers switch their children out of the crib once they’re 35 inches tall, which is often around ages 18 - 24 months []. However, many toddlers that young struggle with staying in bed since impulse control is still developing. That’s why waiting until around age 3 often leads to a smoother transition.

That said, if your child is trying to climb out of the crib, safety comes first — you may need to make the switch sooner. Every child is different, so trust your instincts and do what feels right for your family!

Schedule factors

You might find that your toddler has a hard time staying in bed at bedtime if they’re not tired enough to sleep. This tends to happen when the wake window between naptime and bedtime is too short. Similarly, they might have trouble falling asleep if their schedule doesn’t align with their natural circadian rhythm, which can happen if bedtime is too early or too late for their biological sleep drive. 

Just like all children, toddlers’ sleep needs change as they grow. If your little one isn’t tired at bedtime, they may simply need a small schedule adjustment — like a shorter nap or a slightly later bedtime — to help them settle more easily and drift off to sleep

Schedule misalignment can also lead to challenges like split nights (staying awake for long periods at night) and early wake-ups. By age 2, many toddlers need about 6 hours of awake time between their nap and bedtime to be sufficiently tired. If your child is 3 years or older and they already have 6 hours of awake time before bed, they might be struggling to sleep at night because it’s . While some kids still need a nap until around age 5, there’s a range of normal when it comes to stopping daytime naps. When considering their nap, it can also be helpful to make sure the nap isn’t too long or ending too late. If their nap is ending too close to bedtime, they might just not be tired enough to sleep. 

Developmental factors

Toddlers are still learning a lot about themselves and the world around them. They may have trouble managing their emotions and impulses, including the impulse to get out of bed at night []. Toddlers also often like to test limits and push boundaries []. This is just one of the many ways they learn! While it’s common toddler behavior, it doesn’t make it fun when it’s 2 AM and you just want to sleep. 

Toddlers are also naturally curious and strive to be independent and these traits can serve them well during the day. They’re learning new things about the world and they often want to “do it by self.” While these traits are helpful for their development, they can contribute to nighttime sleep struggles. 

Emotional factors

Toddlers often experience , and they might get out of bed because they want to be with you or they’re looking for comfort. Some kids might also have , causing them to get out of bed. They might even have nightmares for the first time and struggle to tell dreams from reality, making them even scarier [].

Your toddler might also have trouble staying in bed if there is a change in their life or they’re going through something challenging. For example, they might get out of bed more often after a new sibling is born, starting nursery school, or if they’re not feeling well. 

Sleep environment factors

Sometimes, toddlers struggle to stay in bed if their environment isn’t conducive to sleep. For example, if they can see their toys sitting on the other side of the room, it can be very tempting for them to get up and play with them. They might also know that other people in the house are still awake and want to spend time with them. 

Other factors in their room that may impact sleep include the level of darkness, the temperature, and the noise level in the room. 

Safety concerns surrounding getting out of bed at night

Risk of injury

Getting out of bed at night can pose various safety concerns for toddlers who are exploring their surroundings in the dark and unattended. They might trip over toys, fall down stairs, or get into something they shouldn’t. It can also be a safety concern if kids encounter household pets at night while unsupervised. While this can feel scary, there are strategies you can put in place to make your home safer. your home and your child’s room can help ensure their safety. 

How to ensure a safe sleep space

There are many ways you can keep your child safe at night, and chances are, you’ve already put many childproofing measures in place throughout your home. If you want to keep your toddler in their room at night, you might consider baby gates or child-proofing devices like door monkeys and knob covers. You can childproof their room using furniture anchors, outlet covers, and window locks. 

If your toddler can get out of their room, it’s a good idea to think about safety throughout the entire house as well. Some parents use bells or door alarms to alert them if their child leaves their room. You can also use locks or baby gates to block access to stairs, exterior doors, and other safety hazards in your home. Some other childproofing measures you can take include []:

• Anchoring heavy furniture to the walls

• Crating pets

• Installing childproof latches on drawers and cabinets

• Covering outlets

• Locking windows

• Keeping cords out of reach 

Tips for encouraging your child to stay in bed

Tip 1: Lengthen your bedtime routine

A consistent can help your toddler stay in bed and get adequate sleep []. Maintaining this routine can also cue your child’s brain that it’s time to sleep [].

Note that it’s common for toddlers to need 30 - 45 minutes in a dim light setting in order to produce sufficient melatonin (a hormone that signals the internal clock that it’s time to sleep) []. Consider lengthening your pre-bedtime routine if it’s shorter than 30 minutes or if it doesn’t seem like they’re capable of falling asleep at bedtime. 

Tip 2: Offer extra support before sleep

Consider offering more comfort and support during the bedtime routine to help your toddler feel more secure. You might recite some affirmations with them, cuddle in their bed for 5 minutes before you turn off the lights and leave, or create a special goodnight handshake. For example, you could say, "You are safe, you are loved, and I’ll see you in the morning." These small rituals can help strengthen the connection many children crave before going to sleep.

Tip 3: Implement an age-appropriate sleep schedule

If your child isn’t tired enough at bedtime, they might be more likely to try to get out of bed. An age-appropriate sleep schedule can help ensure they’re getting enough sleep and tired enough at bedtime. This might include capping or dropping the nap, especially if your toddler is older than 3 years. If they’re still napping (but don’t actually need daytime sleep) or napping too late, they might not have enough sleep pressure to fall asleep at bedtime. 

A might include waking at 7 AM, napping at 12:30 PM, and going to bed at 8:30 PM. A might look like waking at 6:30 AM and going to bed at 7 PM (bedtime moves earlier once they’re no longer napping). 

Tip 4: Set expectations and boundaries 

Clear boundaries and consistent expectations often help children thrive, especially at bedtime. A structured routine provides a sense of security, making it easier for them to relax and fall asleep.

Start by establishing simple, predictable bedtime rules that your child can understand and follow. For example, you might agree to read one book together once they’re tucked into bed or decide on a set number of cuddles before lights out. Using visual bedtime charts or gentle reminders can help reinforce these expectations in a positive way.

It’s also important to stay consistent — children may test boundaries, but knowing what to expect each night helps reduce bedtime battles. If your toddler asks for "just one more" book or an extra trip out of bed, gently remind them of the routine and offer reassurance instead. Over time, these consistent expectations can make bedtime a smoother, more enjoyable experience for both of you.

Tip 5: Consider positive reinforcement

Some parents find it helpful to use positive reinforcement to help their kids stay in bed. This might look like a , where your child earns a sticker for positive behavior (staying in bed at bedtime or throughout the night, in this case). 

Tip 6: Make their bedroom special

Getting your child excited about their room (and bed) may help them feel comfortable and want to stay put for the night. Consider changing the decor, adding comfort items like a special pillow or stuffed animal (note that the AAP recommends waiting until age 2 to let your child sleep with a pillow), letting them pick out bedding, or using a non-blue light nightlight []. (Choose a light with a warm amber or red hue, as these colors are less likely to disrupt melatonin production and sleep cycles.) Invite your child to get involved so their room feels like their own.

Some kids struggle with staying in bed because they’re afraid of the dark, have nighttime fears, or are experiencing separation anxiety. Nightlights, stuffed animals, and other comfort items might help them get over these fears. Overcoming bedtime anxiety in children can be difficult, but might encourage your kiddo to stay in their room.  

Tip 7: Try a toddler clock 

A uses visual cues, like lights or symbols, to help kids know when they should be in bed and when it’s OK to get up. This can help reinforce the boundaries and expectations you’ve set up with your child. This can be especially beneficial for toddlers who might struggle to comprehend boundaries. It’s also a simple way to help you as the parent enforce bedtime rules. It can be helpful to use a toddler clock in conjunction with a sticker chart or other positive reinforcement.

Tip 8: Adjust meals or snacks

Sometimes kids struggle to stay in bed because they’re hungry. If your little one is or for long periods during the night because they’re hungry, a few tweaks can sometimes make a big difference! Try offering a small, nutritious bedtime snack, like yogurt with fruit or cheese and whole wheat crackers, to keep their tummy full until morning. Make sure they’re eating enough during the day with balanced meals and snacks that include , healthy fats, and carbs. 

If dinner feels too early, you can also try moving it a bit later. These small changes can help your child sleep longer and wake up feeling well-rested, although you may need to combine them with routine changes (like keeping the lights off and staying in sleep mode before 6:00 AM) to see significant results.

How to handle night wakings and setbacks

Be consistent with limits and offer reassurance

Consistency is key with any boundary you are trying to set with your toddler. It can be hard for your child to know what to do or expect if they don’t know the rules and limits. This is particularly true for young toddlers just learning about rules and limits for the first time! 

A common technique is to quietly and calmly walk your child back to their room when they get out of bed. You can reassure them that they’re safe in their room and that you’ll check on them throughout the night. You can quietly remind them that it’s still nighttime and that they can get out of bed in the morning. This is where the visual cue of a toddler clock can come in handy.

Whatever method you choose to get your child back to bed if they get out, do your best to be as consistent as possible. If you let them stay up with you to eat a snack one night, or invite them to snuggle in bed with you, they may begin to expect that every time they get out of bed.  

Consider sleep training

Sleep training can help your child learn to fall asleep independently (i.e. without your presence) if they haven’t done so previously or are suddenly having difficulty falling asleep or staying asleep without your help. 

isn’t quite the same as sleep training a baby, but it can help with bedtime and nighttime waking if a sleep onset association (e.g. being rocked or held to sleep) contributes to their sleep issues. Consider submitting for a customized sleep plan through if you need help figuring out a sleep training method that’s right for your family.

Set realistic expectations

Though your toddler likely seems so much more mature than they were as a newborn baby, it’s helpful to remember that their brains are still developing. Toddlers typically need help managing their impulses and practicing self-control []. Setting realistic expectations helps ensure you’re not asking more than they’re developmentally ready for. For example, expecting them to stay in their room for an hour after waking up or to fall asleep before their body is truly ready can lead to frustration for both of you. Instead, working with their natural rhythms and abilities can make bedtime and mornings smoother for everyone. It’s important to expect occasional setbacks along the way. Your toddler might catch a cold, struggle with sleep while traveling, or wake up from a nightmare needing extra comfort — and that’s completely normal. These temporary challenges are just part of the journey. Once things are back to normal, remind them of your nighttime expectations to get back on track. 

Takeaway

• Many toddlers have trouble falling asleep and staying asleep for various reasons. Developmental milestones like building self-control and asserting independence can make it challenging for toddlers to stay in bed. Emotional factors such as feeling scared or struggling with separation anxiety often have an impact too. Other times, they’re not tired enough or want to do “fun” things instead of sleep.  

• If your child gets out of bed at night, it’s important to consider various safety factors. Consider using baby gates, furniture anchors, and other childproofing measures in their bedroom and throughout your house. 

• You can encourage your child to stay in bed by setting expectations and boundaries, keeping bedtime consistent, using an age-appropriate sleep schedule, implementing positive reinforcement, using a toddler clock, and making their bedroom feel special. Sleep training, setting realistic expectations, and being consistent can also help when you’re trying to keep your toddler in their bed.